emily the hunchback.

When I was around 11 I started getting pain in my back if I sat on a chair without a back rest or if I stood too long. I'm pretty sure most humans on this planet have similar pain doing those things, but as I kept getting older the pain got worse. When I was 16 I had to get a physical for my tennis team, and the doctor told me I had Scoliosis. I was super confused because they make you get checked in school every year and no one had ever said anything to me about it before. I'm pretty sure everyone's favorite day of gym class was the day they checked your backs because you got to waste a lot of time doing nothing. Well apparently those Scoliosis checker people have no idea what they're doing. Thanks public education. It was kind of nice to understand why my back hurt so bad, but also scary to look into the possibility of surgery. Well I put it off for two years, and my back got really bad. I'm at the point where I wake up in pain and go to bed in even worse pain. The only position that relieves any of the pain is lying flat on my back, but even that sucks. During this Christmas break I decided to go get my back looked at by a specialist because I was tired of always hurting. I got some x-rays and I was just expecting to find out how bad my Scoliosis was, but it turns out I don't even have Scoliosis! The curvature in my back is called Thoracic Kyphosis. This is similar to Scoliosis except Scoliosis is when your spine is curved like an "S" and Kyphosis is when your spine is curved like a hump. Super attractive, I know. A normal spinal curve is 40-45%, and my curve is 78%. 

(a normal spine on the left, my spine on the right)

The amazing news is that I don't need surgery! I don't even want to imagine that scenario. But the bad news is that I have to do a ton of physical therapy. I started physical therapy the first week of January, and it has been going well. I go twice a week every week, and each appointment is about 2 hours and 45 minutes. Obviously it's a struggle to dedicate 6 hours a week to physical therapy when I have a million other things going on, but I know it'll be worth it. I'm making friends with all of my aids and all the elderly patients, so it's actually kind of fun. There's an elderly woman who always talks about how she used to have a swearing problem, and an elderly man who never wears socks. They're cool people. A lot of the aids are really attractive young men, but it sucks because they're all married. I call them Hot Steven, or Hot Brian, or Hot whatever their name is. Don't worry, I already know I'm an inappropriate person. The physical therapy has been helping, but I definitely have a long way to go. I'm not really excited to get older because this will only get worse with age. I hope I don't end up looking like Quasi Moto, because I can't even get dates looking the way I do right now! Anyways, show my x-rays to your children and scare them into having good posture. That's not why my spine is curved, but I'm sure growing up with better posture would have helped haha. Oh, and special shout out to my roommate Kiana for all the back massages. You're appreciated. 

2015.

I've never really been into New Year resolutions for a couple reasons. One being that resolutions are hardly ever kept past February, and the other being that you can set goals for yourself anytime of the year not just January 1st. It's just always funny to me how big of a deal everyone makes this time of year when it is really just another day. However, I do feel a sense of optimism about 2015 that I haven't really felt about past new years. 2014 was kind of a weird year for me. I went through a lot of life changes, some fun and some not so fun. Strangely enough, graduating high school and moving away from home were not the most dramatic events of this year. I've had to really relearn who I am and figure out how to live a new life- a life of adulthood and self-understanding. Because of all these changes in my life and within myself in 2014, I can make 2015 a year of building and bettering. I have exposed my struggles and imperfections so blatantly that I can now learn to improve and grow. It's kind of how you have to tear down a foundation in order to rebuild something stronger and better. I have hope that in this year I will learn to feel comfortable with my life and become a happier person. I think no matter where we are in our life, this is something we all can do. All of us go through trials that help us understand ourselves in new ways. We can always take these type of experiences to become better, kinder, and wiser. I have set New Year resolutions this time around, and I feel determined to continue them past February. I hope all of us take this year to improve ourselves and become a person we've always wanted to be. When it comes to character improvement, nothing is really impossible. We can all become the person we dream of being. I'm cringing at how cliche this all sounds, but it is true. I just want to be a good person with a satisfying life, and I hope 2015 brings me one step closer to that. 

christmas.

So Christmas has come and gone, and I still haven't written about it! I hope everyone had as an amazing of a Christmas as I did. I'm so glad I got to spend it at home with all of my family. I made a quick video of our Christmas Eve and Christmas morning. The reason I haven't posted this yet is because I've been waiting to return to school so I have fast enough internet to upload the video, haha my parent's house has the worst internet in the world. A tradition that isn't shown in the video is delivering food at the hospital. Ever since I can really remember this has always been a tradition since my dad has always worked at a hospital. We deliver a Christmas dinner to the employees who have to work on Christmas Eve. It is always really fun even though we are just walking around the hospital handing out food. Things that are shown in the video are our Christmas Eve dinner, playing What's In My Box off of Jimmy Fallon, a money dice game, opening presents, and just being with family. If you don't watch Jimmy Fallon, the game is two people sitting across from each other with a barrier so the opponent can see your face but not your box, then one person looks at the contents of their box and describes what is in it and the other player decides if they are telling the truth or lying. It was hilarious. Anyways, I had a lovely Christmas and a lovely break! It was great to take time away from the stress of normal life and focus on the Lord and all our blessings. I'm so grateful for our Savior and his love for all of us, and I'm so grateful for my family and our love for each other. Hope you all had a wonderful holiday season as well!