this is kinda hard.

Alright so here's an update on my life. I had to say goodbye to my first placement Kilimahewa, because they are taking a month off for holiday. It was really sad to say goodbye to my group of 70 perfect little angels. They seriously were the happiest/craziest kiddos ever. They were obsessed with singing and dancing and holding your hands. They would come running through the fence the moment we arrived to school every morning. I also fell in love with the most precious girl named Nadia. She would follow me around everyone...or maybe I was following her around everywhere... same thing. She would always rub my arm and sing songs to me. She was probably the smartest one in that whole school, but she just chilled peacefully while everyone else acted like they ran the place. She would kiss me on the cheek and would make sure she gave me a hug before I'd leave. Ugh she was seriously so precious. I miss her so much. Anyways, this was a really good first placement for me because it was more relaxed, and the teachers could speak pretty good English. It eased me into the whole "teaching Swahili speaking children when you don't speak Swahili". So now I am at a new nursery school called Best Hope. It is about a mile down the street from my house, so I get to walk there and back. The class sizes are way smaller than at Kilimahewa. In my class there are only about 10, and only about 50 in the whole school. It's so much nicer to have a small group to work with. Although the language barrier is still there, we get so much more done! These two weeks I really have started to feel like I have been an effective teacher and that the children are actually progressing academically. It is seriously the most rewarding thing in the world to watch children master something you taught them. That's why being a teacher (in any country) is the best thing ever!

Coming into this whole experience I knew it would be hard. I knew it would be a challenge to adjust to a new culture, new lifestyle, and new language. However, I didn't really understand how hard the work would actually be. Surprisingly, the work is the only aspect of this thing that I get stressed over haha. Since I am majoring in Early Childhood Education, I figured the teaching here would be easier than the stuff I have to do for school back home. I was so wrong. It's so much harder. In America teachers are given curriculum, resources, aides, and 4 years of training. Teachers in Tanzania only have to complete 2 years of higher education, and then aren't given any resources/curriculum for their students.When you show up to teach as a volunteer the teacher just kind of goes "Here is your class," and then leaves. They don't really tell you how old the children are, where they are academically, or what they are supposed to be learning. You just have to figure you it out the best you can. Talk about the scariest thing ever haha. It's such a challenge to teach useful and challenging curriculum in a different language when you aren't given any resources (except chalk and a blackboard) and no guidance as to where they should be academically. I came here to actually do something and actually help these children learn, so that's what I've been trying my best to do. I could easily just play games with them all day, which would relieve a lot of my stressors, but that also doesn't give the children what they need to be successful.

At Best Hope I have already had to say goodbye to one of my classes, and I have gained a new one. It is so hard to switch through so many children constantly. It's like you just get started on something, but then they leave to go on holiday or you get your placement switched. It's a little frustrating, but at the same time I have loved getting to teach SO many different children. I am obsessed with every student I've had, and in the end this is making me a way better teacher. Today was my first day with my new class, and I feel so on fire. They are 7, so they are able to sit and listen and want to learn. They were willing to participate and were patient with my small Swahili vocabulary. The children here are seriously so bright. I was able to teach borrowing a 10 in subtraction and carrying a 10 in addition to two different classes in a language that isn't their own, and the majority of them were able to pick it up the first day. Also the first group I taught it to were 5...so that was impressive to me. I feel so lucky I get to be doing something that will help me in my future career. I also feel so lucky to be helping children learn English, which is something that their teachers aren't able to teach them. I'm sure most of you want me to be blogging about all the different adventures I'm going on, but honestly teaching is what I came here for and it's the best part of this trip. I could talk about it all day. However, I have done some pretty cool things that I'll write about once I find the time haha. It's less important. I hope you all are doing well in America! Tanzania is way prettier tho. Sorry not sorry.

Missing my Kilimahewa babies. (Mostly just Nadia if you can't tell)

 But now loving my Best Hope babies.

safari.

Like a million days ago I went on a safari, but I still haven't written about it so here I go.

Our entire group of volunteers decided to get together and go on a weekend safari, which was one of the coolest things I've ever done ever. We went with a tour agency that took us camping for 3 days and took us to visit the Masai tribe and to visit the Tangire and Ngorongoro national parks. That weekend was a really incredible bonding experience for our group of volunteers. We all stayed up late around the dinner table or camp fire, sharing stories and telling jokes. This group of people left for home yesterday, so I'm getting all sentimental thinking back on our safari. I freaking love them. I have loved getting to know each of them and becoming one big family. I miss them so much already! Ok well anyways, back to the safari haha. 

Day 1 we visited the Masai tribe. In the area of Kilimanjaro there are a few prominent tribes- one being the Masai. They are often used as symbols to represent Tanzania, or Africa in general. Like even when I just visited the Portland Zoo I saw a bunch of stuff on the Masai in the Africa exhibits. They are known for being very tall and thin, and for jumping up and down with long sticks haha. When we arrived they greeted us with a song and dance, and then allowed us to join in. I definitely can't jump as high as them. It was only somewhat embarrassing. Then they showed us their houses, which are just one room mud huts. The men in the tribe can have several wives (depending on how many cows he has) so each wife gets their own hut for them and their children. The husband then rotates around to the different huts to be with each different wife. They also eat blood. So that was an interesting conversation. I felt strange being a tourist in their village. It almost felt like their culture was being used as a prop. It made me feel weird and sad. They honestly didn't seem to mind because they kept wanting us to take more pictures and stay longer, but I minded. However knowing me and my hypocritical self...I took pictures anyways.

Day 2 we spent the day in Tangire National Park, which is inside a massive crater. In order to get into the crater you have to drive up really high before dipping back down into the valley. We were so high up  that we were inside clouds, so everything was just white. It was kinda freaky haha. At this park it looks like a typical savanna. Tall grass, not many trees, and small little ponds. We saw a lot of lions, zebras, wildebeest, gazelles, rhinos, warthogs, hippos, and hyenas. It was super pretty. The whole time we just couldn't believe we were in Africa. We also couldn't stop singing The Lion King and calling the animals by their character names in the movie haha. The best moment was when we came within a couple yards of a mama lion nursing her little cubs. It was a really beautiful experience.

Day 2 we went to the other national park, Ngorongoro. The park was very different looking than the other one. It was very hilly and had a ton of those super cool trees that you see in movies and stuff haha. There were a ton of giraffes and elephants in this one. We kept coming across herds of elephants crossing the roads, so we would stop for them to pass right by our cars. I was within a yard of massive elephants. It was the most surreal thing ever. We would just sit and watch them for hours. I started counting the amount of elephants in one of the herds and lost track at 42. There were so dang many.

i'm here.

Jambo, friends!

I have been in the beautiful country of Tanzania for over a week now. It honestly feels like it has been so much longer tho. A lot of unfortunate and unexpected events have occurred during my time here like getting my luggage lost for 3 days, having my credit card canceled when it got eaten by an ATM, and having my dear grandmother pass away. Through all these not so fun things I have been able to remain happy simply because this country is just SO happy. Everyone here is incredibly friendly, and they all have the shiniest faces I've ever seen. It's considered rude if you don't say hello to everyone you pass on the streets. The Swahili greeting in a casual setting is "mambo", which means "what's up", and the response is "poa", which means "cool". I feel very lucky to be in a place that promotes such positivity and kindness. It has really made this whole adjustment easy breezy. I honestly haven't had any emotional break downs and haven't felt home sick, so that's good. I'm sure I'll feel differently in a couple weeks haha.

Alright so my average day here in Moshi starts with a lovely breakfast at 6:30 am (lol it's the worst I hate mornings), then all the volunteers go to their work placements. I am currently at a nursery school called Kilimahewa, but the placements in the house also include working at the hospital, at a public health research center, a woman's empowerment center, and other primary schools. After work we come back home to eat and in the evenings we have a cultural activity. These types of activities include Swahili lessons, guest speakers, cultural norm lessons, arts and crafts, and more. My favorite guest speaker so far was someone from the board of education who came to answer questions about the education system here. I am going to rant for two seconds about the education system in Tanzania, if you don't care go ahead and skip this part haha.

*entering rant* Ok so the education system here has some pretty big issues. As far as I understand the way public education is set up is primary school (ages 5-14), secondary school (ages 14-18) and then college or technical training. The test you must take to get into secondary school is administered in English... but get this...they don't teach English in primary school. A student has 3 months between primary school and the entrance exam for secondary school to learn English on their own time. AND you can only take the entrance exam one time. If you fail it you have to find another thing to do with your life or pay to privately take the exam again as an independent party which is apparently super expensive and people don't have the money for that. This is a big reason why so many people here are uneducated and live in poverty, because most of them can't even get into high school. The government recognizes this as an issue, but they don't know what to do about it. They don't want to get rid of Swahili because that is a huge reason why Tanzania is so unified and language is a huge part of culture, but they also can't get rid of English because they recognize that as the business language and most advanced textbooks can't be translated from English to Swahili. I don't know what they are going to do, but it is definitely sad to see so many children dying to learn English when none of their teachers speak English. So ya, there's that. *exiting rant*

After our cultural activity we eat dinner and go to bed. I have been falling asleep at like 9 pm every night because these days make me so exhausted haha. It's kind of nice to have a strict schedule, but at the same time I miss getting to wake up after the sun is already out and getting to take naps haha.

So back to my work placement- Kilimahewa. That place is such a dream. I have SO much fun every day. It is a nursery school for children ages like 2-7. I swear I still don't understand how the ages at this place work haha. At first I thought it was for 3-5 but then I met a 2 year old and a 7 year old, so I really have no idea haha. There are 70+ students and 2 teachers. On average only 60 students come, but that varies depending on the weather. On bad weather days a lot of children don't show up because they have to walk to school alone and obviously a 4 year old isn't going to do that if it's raining. There are a lot of good things about this school and a lot of not so good things. The good thing is that the two teachers, Loucas and Linduh, love teaching and they love their students. They really put a lot of energy into the class and you can tell they truly care. However, the way some things are taught and administered are super inappropriate and ineffective. The split the class into three sections, the babies, the middles, and the older. The first red flag here is that they aren't divided by performance but by age instead. The teacher will give one or two sections of the class a task (9/10 times this means a worksheet. For 4 year olds. Real appropriate.) and then will leave the other part of the class with nothing to do. They teacher expects the rest of the children to sit with their heads on the desk while the other students do their worksheet. This obviously doesn't fly when there are 70 students shoved together on a bench with nothing to do. It leads to a lot of fights, a lot of noise, and a lot of stress. The teacher also never explains the worksheet or test before handing it out so then we have to go around to each individual student and explain it to them...in English...when they speak Swahili. You can see the issues here. Another worrying thing I've seen is the way they do tests. They hand the test out and come around to each student and erase their incorrect answers to put in the right one. So basically they just let the students try to do the test, but then fix the whole thing for them anyways. How are the teachers supposed to know what the students do and do not know if they aren't even looking at their actual answers? I don't know if they are trying to make their school look better or get more funding by changing their test scores or what. All I know is that I get in trouble when I let a child put the wrong answer like a teacher should. It's kind of frustrating. Another weird thing is that Kilimahewa is a private school. This means that this school is supposed to be nicer and higher quality than public schools. Guys, this school doesn't even have lined paper, books, or erasers. I can't even begin to imagine what condition the public schools are in. Even though my work is tiring and seemingly ineffective, I love it and feel so blessed to be there everyday.

I feel like there are a million things I have learned and experienced already, but I don't know how to put it all into words. I'll just try to make a list of some things I have liked and things I haven't liked. Things I've Liked: eating avocados and sugar bananas at every meal, children screaming "mzungu" (white person) at us when we walk down the street, the gorgeous jungle we live in, drinking freshly squeezed mango juice in the mornings, the way people smile here (it's different I tell ya), the really hot teacher I work with, learning new words everyday, the friend's I've mad at the house, the way my name sounds in an African accent, and the little kiddos who are my friends even when I can't teach them as well as I'd like.Things I Haven't Liked: sleeping under a mosquito net every night (I've named him Phil), the loud monkeys and birds outside my window, having to brush my teeth with bottled water, the cold and small showers, the fact that I have very limited knowledge in Swahili, the non-perforated toilet paper!!!!!!!!!, having to drive down the bumpiest dirt roads known to man, and not being on the same time zone as my friends and family.

I have had a lot of time to think while I've been here. Haha I suppose that's what happens when you have no TV or reliable WiFi. But I have had a lot of time to think of how truly lucky I am. I feel like a lot of American volunteers would come to Africa and feel "blessed" because they have hot showers and nice clothes...which I do feel blessed for having, but that's not what I think when I see Tanzania. I don't look at these people and think how "unfortunate" they must be because they don't have the things I have. They are totally happy here. People need to know that. Just because our country is "developed" and theirs is "developing", it doesn't mean we are better. Everyone is equal and everyone has potential. Yes there are a lot of sad things I have to witness everyday, like children with no shoes and worms in their bellies, but these people also have so much that I don't. The people here have so much love and passion for life. There is so much unconditional happiness here that I have never felt in America. I don't feel lucky because I feel bad for their differences in living conditions, I feel lucky because I get to experience such a beautiful place. I am lucky to share with the people in Moshi the things that I have while they share with me the things that they have. I have the privilege of leaving my bubble in Utah and getting to feel and learn things that are only available through travel. I feel so lucky to meet these people and learn from their way of life, which is much more simple than mine. There are just a lot of things that are changing my life in the most basic ways, and that is the best feeling in the world. I love life, I love new things, and I love Africa.

Our super hot, SINGLE, teacher Loucas

cruisin'.

Several months ago I started planning a vacation with my two best friends, and we decided on a cruise. It was super affordable and easy for three young adults to pull off and it looked super fun. After we worked out all the traveling details and money issues we tried booking our tickets...and guess what...we couldn't because none of us were 21. I understand why cruise lines wouldn't want a bunch of teenagers running around unsupervised, but like we are somewhat adults (kind of not really but kind of). If I am expected to pay taxes and live on my own and can vote for the president of the United States of America, then I should dang well be allowed to go on a freaking cruise. Ok well anyways we ended up inviting my parents, which wasn't a bad option. I love traveling with them anyways so it was a win-win haha. They stayed in a separate room on the other side of the boat, and it was nice having them around to be responsible when we didn't want to be haha. The cruise was so so so fun. It was really stormy the whole time so the waves were massive. People were throwing up and falling down all over the place haha. I loved the cruise, but I probably couldn't have handled a longer one. None of us threw up, but we all were super dizzy the whole time. However, it was so fun just to be able to eat whenever and club all night and have unlimited entertainment. Catalina Island and Ensenada, Mexico were both so fun and so different. Catalina Island was warm and sunny and so cute. We got to drive golf carts around the island, stroll through the little shops and go on a glass bottom boat. That place is seriously the cutest little vacation spot. The whole island just looks like a post card haha. We knew Ensenada was going to be rainy, so we started with zip lining early in the morning to avoid the rain. It was incredible! Throughout the zip lines were rope courses that were actually kind of scary and hard to do. My friend hates heights, and they were definitely high, so I was super impressed she did them without too much hesitation haha. It was gorgeous to be over some pretty lakes and through the canopies of the mountains. The weather was completely downhill from there. It poured. And I mean poured. The streets were flooding like crazy and every layer of our clothes were soaked. It honestly looked like we all jumped in a swimming pool. We got to go to a blow hole (don't remember what it was called opps) and walk down a street (more like river) that had cute little shops and foods. It would have been so fun to be able to spend more time looking through the stores, but we couldn't even see because of how bad it was raining haha. It wasn't the day we expected, but it was so much fun. We couldn't stop laughing the whole time at how crazy it was.  It was one of those experiences that I'll remember forever. Getting drenched on in Mexico with my two best friends haha. We also got to eat some delicious Mexican food at a tiny hole in the wall restaurant. My favorite part was their tortilla soup. We've all been craving it since haha. Anyways, I made a little vacation video of the trip. Obviously Mexico is poorly documented because of the rain, but I'm still glad I have these memories on video. Going on a cruise with your best friends is definitely a good time. I miss it already!

christmas 2015.

It most definitely is the most wonderful time of the year! I love getting to be home from college for the holidays. Being with every member of my family is truly the greatest gift. It doesn't matter what is under the tree or how many people bought me presents. All that matters is being with my family and remembering the birth of our Savior. I am so grateful that Heavenly Father sent his son to earth so we could all return to our home in heaven. This Christmas season has encouraged me to reflect on the daily gifts I can give back to my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. Serving those around me is the most important thing I can be doing to show Heavenly Father and my brothers and sisters my love for them. Our love, time, and selflessness are the most precious gifts we can give. I encourage everyone to forget themselves and focus on others. Doing that is what brings the magic back into the holiday season and makes the whole year magical too. Anyways, I made a Christmas video again! I love getting to have our family traditions and moments like these on video, so we can watch them and remember the fun times we have together. I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas!